Any Suggestions?

Today is a very rainy Monday, and I decided that I would dub today a productive one. But it's not going so well. I can't concentrate on writing my 15 page essay about my life in Istanbul compared to my life in Muncie because I'm not feeling very creative. I can't work on my 15 page paper about diversity on campus because my interest on the topic has dwindled to nothing. I can't read essays from a book called "The Best Creative Non-Fiction" because I get jealous. If I don't get jealous, I find myself wondering why the crappy essay was picked to go in this collection. 

I have been 23 for exactly one month now, and for 23 years and one month I have been the worst procrastinator I know. Yes, since the moment I was born, I put off doing anything that needed to be done. I have tried everything I could to get myself to do something ahead of time, or sometimes even on time, and it doesn't work. To be honest, probably the only thing I have tried is telling myself I will do it. I don't know...I guess I just work a lot better under pressure. 

Are there any little goody two-shoes out there who do their work on time, and can fill me in on how they are able to do that? If you prefer, I am open to the idea of you doing my work for me. Just kidding, just kidding (but seriously).